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On The Move Removals

Here's the latest from Bristols Finest On The Move Removals:




They are at it again

A statement from Peter Vague Himself:

In regards to the recent news article that featured my company. I stand by my decision to track the heart rates of my staff members. As a business owner, it helps me whittle down, the smokers, and the lazy b*st!rd's who always pretend to be doing up their shoelaces when it comes to moving the washing machines. If you're not doing it already then, I highly recommend the Fitbit option synced with the Sh1tstaff app; it is particularly good for weeding out your 15 tea break and above employees.

04/01/2021 #satire #comedy


Keeping things Topical


I’ll be honest the decision to pull cyberpunk 2077 has come as a major relief to my company. I really didn’t fancy pulling porters out of their bedsits for the next year by their ankles.
I’d already started getting calls in this week “Peter Peter,I can’t come in, I’m self-isolating” yeah right! I saw your old PS4 up for sale on Facebook marketplace, pull the other leg mate!
Seriously last time they released a Call of Duty I ended up getting stuck with a team of dopey eyed, pasty looking IT technicians.
Anyway, I’ve decided that if you can’t beat them, join em.
From today onwards CyberPete is offering a selection of highly affordable pack and moves.
Prices start at -
£20.77 - 4 Bedroom house Pack and Move.
SHARE THIS POST >> Help On The Move Removals become the UK's number one removal firm.



19/12/2020 #satire #comedy